I woke up and found myself enveloped in a murky hazeof the Monday morning blahs. I shuffled languidly towards my window and hoped
with childish anticipation that the outdoors would reflect my dreary
disposition. While it wasn’t the quintessential summer day that would be
advertised in a tourism guidebook, the sun was shining and the sky projected its
usual blue hue with bouffant white clouds. While countless people strolled by my house with their respectable morning gait, a huge sigh bubbled in my throat and
threatened to suffocate me. In the midst of the coughing spell that followed, I
tugged at the blinds and watched it unravel with a razor-sharp resolution, as
if it wanted to shield me from the “happy people.”
Instead of stewing at home in my Monday morning semi-coma,
I showered and traipsed out the door. With no destination in sight, I walked to
the subway station and found myself sitting amongst the“happy people” on the F
train. I stared aimlessly as each stop came and went. When I saw that 42nd
street was approaching, I stood up way before the train came to a halt because I
knew if I didn’t, my slow moving body would cause me to miss the stop. Which
would put me in an even worst mood because I figured Bryant Park would be a
good place to wallow in endless self pity.
I showered and traipsed out the door. With no destination in sight, I walked to
the subway station and found myself sitting amongst the“happy people” on the F
train. I stared aimlessly as each stop came and went. When I saw that 42nd
street was approaching, I stood up way before the train came to a halt because I
knew if I didn’t, my slow moving body would cause me to miss the stop. Which
would put me in an even worst mood because I figured Bryant Park would be a
good place to wallow in endless self pity.
Climbing the subway stairs to get outside, I recoiled
from the glare of the sun. As soon as I stepped foot into what seemed like an alternate
reality, a fashionable young woman chatted on her blackberry at the entrance of
Bryant Park, making all sorts of elaborate hand gestures. Walking by her, I
pictured grabbing the phone from her dancing hands, slamming it onto the
ground and then kicking it into oncoming traffic. I didn’t of course, I took
several injections of home training as a child.
from the glare of the sun. As soon as I stepped foot into what seemed like an alternate
reality, a fashionable young woman chatted on her blackberry at the entrance of
Bryant Park, making all sorts of elaborate hand gestures. Walking by her, I
pictured grabbing the phone from her dancing hands, slamming it onto the
ground and then kicking it into oncoming traffic. I didn’t of course, I took
several injections of home training as a child.
Walking near the Wichcraft stand, the emptiness in
my stomach reminded me that I hadn’t eaten yet. I stood on line for what seemed
like two hours and mindlessly watched as the woman behind the stand stole my
twelve dollars for a measly sandwich and flavorless iced-tea. I ate the entire
thing with the excitement of finding a dirty penny on the ground, that is, when
I finally found a sit in an un-shaded area of the park.
my stomach reminded me that I hadn’t eaten yet. I stood on line for what seemed
like two hours and mindlessly watched as the woman behind the stand stole my
twelve dollars for a measly sandwich and flavorless iced-tea. I ate the entire
thing with the excitement of finding a dirty penny on the ground, that is, when
I finally found a sit in an un-shaded area of the park.
After my delectable dining experience, I took out my
iPod in an attempt to drown out all the people who seemed to be skipping about with
joy. Less than a minute later, a lady approached me with a folder full of paper
in her hands. Her mouth was moving but I couldn’t hear a word. At that moment I
was so grateful for my trusty IPod. I figured she would leave me alone when
she saw my blatant disinterest in whatever she was offering.
iPod in an attempt to drown out all the people who seemed to be skipping about with
joy. Less than a minute later, a lady approached me with a folder full of paper
in her hands. Her mouth was moving but I couldn’t hear a word. At that moment I
was so grateful for my trusty IPod. I figured she would leave me alone when
she saw my blatant disinterest in whatever she was offering.
Casting my lack of interest aside, she motioned for
me to remove my earpiece. I did so with reluctance and forged a smile upon my
face. “Can I help you?” I said, she replied in what I suspected was a higher
pitch “Do you like Poetry?”
me to remove my earpiece. I did so with reluctance and forged a smile upon my
face. “Can I help you?” I said, she replied in what I suspected was a higher
pitch “Do you like Poetry?”
For a brief moment, I wondered, “Is it my destiny to
encounter every crazy old lady in the city?” Check out post number seven, What’sthe strangest thing that ever happened to you in the subways of New York City? But
I digress.
encounter every crazy old lady in the city?” Check out post number seven, What’sthe strangest thing that ever happened to you in the subways of New York City? But
I digress.
I don’t know what propelled the word “yes” out of my
mouth but as soon as it made its exit, I wanted to reach out, grab it and swallow
it back up.
mouth but as soon as it made its exit, I wanted to reach out, grab it and swallow
it back up.
As she sat next to me and began rummaging through the
different compartments of the folder she had in her hands, I stared at her with
a vacant expression. Suddenly, I felt different. What had changed? A second ago, I couldn’t wait
for her to disappear from my sight.
different compartments of the folder she had in her hands, I stared at her with
a vacant expression. Suddenly, I felt different. What had changed? A second ago, I couldn’t wait
for her to disappear from my sight.
Then she handed me a sheet of paper with a
poem entitled “God Cares.” I fiddled with it not knowing what to do or say but without uttering
a word, she took it from me and pulled out her glasses from the lapel of her
shirt. As she read me each stanza with such tender care, I no longer saw her
as a crazy old lady but as a messenger of God.
It all hit me at once. Everything seemed
illuminated. My unemployment was the main source of my Monday morning blah. My
pesky murky haze not only lifted but my frown did a complete 360. After the
poem, she had a few choice words for me but I was too occupied with thinking
about how lucky I was. How lucky I was to be alive, how lucky I was to have a
loving family, how lucky I was to be in that moment.
illuminated. My unemployment was the main source of my Monday morning blah. My
pesky murky haze not only lifted but my frown did a complete 360. After the
poem, she had a few choice words for me but I was too occupied with thinking
about how lucky I was. How lucky I was to be alive, how lucky I was to have a
loving family, how lucky I was to be in that moment.
As she set forth to
deliver her glory to another soul in need, a surge ignited something within me,
a feeling I could only describe as “Holy.” Throughout the entire day, I felt
such a sure sense of hope for the future. A feeling I hope will last for a very
long time.
Leave a Reply