grandmothers, the lifetime TV movie reservoir of family wisdom, who dispenses a
barrage of unsolicited advice in an effort to control her off-springs.
The
quintessential grandmother, who’s perfect in every way and oozes hospitality from
every pore as well as a few other aromas, cakes, pies and an
assortment of warm buttery baked goods.
The fun grandmother, who has never heard of the word discipline and whose sole purpose in life is to spoil her grandchildren into
ravenous little monsters.
The sexy grandmother,
who desperately clings to youth as a child clings to her favorite blankie with
her barely there ensembles that screams look anywhere but here.
And last and certainly not least, my granny who is a mélange
of all of these, minus the sexy part but can look rather stylish when the
occasion calls for it.
but every now and then the uppermost parts that have been subjected to the
elements need to be peeled off to reveal the crisp, fleshy, pristine layers
underneath. Since she has never frequented the world wide web, I feel it’s
safe for me to point out her sole annoying habit.
Granny was fortunate enough to
have had a butler as a child. So when she lazes around the house in her muumuus, she has the tendency to bark
orders at her supposed minions. It’s always, “take out the trash”, “wash the dishes” and while you’re at it make me a five course meal. Alright, I exaggerated on the five course part, it’s more like three. Naturally, before she even finishes her demands, we remind her that she’s not in her native
land, Haiti, and can no longer afford a servant.
Other than that she’s such a sweetheart and the very sight of her warms
my heart. What type of grandmother do you have?
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